CityBeat’s Living Out Loud – Cincinnati Blog

{November 8, 2006}   Voting with C.A. MacConnell

voting.jpgAs luck would have it, when I went to vote here in Clifton yesterday afternoon, my writer friend C.A. MacConnell was in the voting booth right behind me. We both felt like it was a good time to catch up. I happened to have my tape recorder on me, so I taped the conversation. Here’s some of it.

Larry: Well, C.A. MacConnell, imagine meeting you here!

C.A.: Larry, I was going to call you this morning.

Larry: Really? Why?

C.A.: I reread that cover story you did for CityBeat last spring. It moved me to
tears yet again. As far as I’m concerned, you should win a Pulitzer Prize for it.

Larry: Why thank you, C.A. – there is some talk of that. I want you to know I was
totally moved with your “Tiny Death Rows” Column in CityBeat a few weeks
back. I read the story over and over. You told the story of Delbert Lee Tibs like
no other writer. It was truly outstanding.

C.A.: Thank you so much.

Larry: If anyone should be winning the Pulitzer Prize, it should be you.

C.A.: No, no – you should win it for that wonderful collection of short stories that was
published late last year. “Signed, Sealed and Delivered” is a must read. I think
I’ve read it at least 20 times.

Larry: No, you’re too kind. That music piece you wrote on The Risky Antiseptics was
the best piece of music writing I’ve read all year. I’m surprised Rolling Stone
didn’t pick it up.

C.A.: Well, CityBeat paid me more money for it. You know, they always come first
with me.

Larry: And you’re loyal too. C.A., you’re the best.

C.A.: No, you are.

Larry: No, you.

C.A.: No. I think you’re the best.

Larry: Well, all right – if you insist. Hey, wasn’t last night the date with that guy you

C.A.: Yeah.

Larry: How did it go?

C.A.: It wasn’t what I was expecting. The guy didn’t have any protection with him.

Larry: What?

C.A.: It was pretty disappointing.

Larry: I guess I’m shocked, because Teri Archer wrote a wonderful blog post on the
Living Out Loud Cincinnati Blog called “Don’t Lie to Us.” It was all about men
who lie about it when they want to have sex.

C.A.: Yes, that was simply a wonderful piece written by Teri. She’s the best.

Larry: What? I thought you said I was the best.

C.A.: Oh, sorry. No. you’re the best – without a doubt.

Larry: Are you sure?

C.A.: Yes, yes. You are the best.

Larry: Why thank you, C.A. That piece Teri wrote is in a class all it’s own.

C.A.: I’ve heard she’s up for a Pulitzer for it.

Sadly, my time with C.A. yesterday afternoon came to an end much too quickly. It was my best voting experience ever. We must do it again next November.

Larry Gross


Roberta says:

I just finished laughing my ass off. Damn funny.

Jim Stanton says:

Well, maybe we have CA and Larry to thank for getting some changes made in our government yesterday! I know that’s a joke but I’m pretty happy with the voting results yesterday. A change is long overdue.

Matt says:

I know Larry’s not going to be happy that issue 5 passed. If you need a ride over to Covington, let me know. That’s where I’ll be.

Jackie says:

I hope Karen is up and feeling happy this morning. The wage issue passed. Soon a little more money will be going into her pocket 🙂

Karen says:

“The CA & Larry Show.” Funny stuff.

Bitch from Price Hill says:

I find myself thinking of the piece that Teri Archer wrote about how she hates to go to bars and inhale all that cigarette smoke. Well, I’m a smoker who likes to go to bars and drink and smoke. I’m not liking this Archer chick very much this morning.

Erin says:

I think we all knew this issue 5 was going to pass. It exists in other major cities everywhere and it was just a matter of time before it happened here.

I’m a smoker and I can’t say I’m happy about it, but maybe it will force me to cut down and quit at some point. I don’t like it when the government wants to tell us what to do, how to behave, but maybe in this case, it is a good thing.

Jean says:

Two writers full of themselves. Not so funny at all.

Matthew says:

You never seem to like anything on this blog. Why do keep visiting – to complain? You’re becoming almost as bad as numb.

The post was meant to be funny and was. You took it seriously. Know what? lighten up.

Paula says:

I’m with Matt when it comes to this issue 5 bullshit. I don’t EVER see Kentucky doing this since it is a tobacco state. I’ll be over in Covington or Newport drinking and smoking. Cincinnati and downtwon keeps fucking itself.

Jake says:

Is this Jean person mean jean? The one who just got reelected? With her attitude, I’m thinking it is.

Debbie says:

Today’s post gave me a total laughing fit.

Jen says:

T000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 funny.

C.A. MacConnell says:

Actually, here’s what went on for real. I was concentrating on the voting, in the booth, concentrating very hard. Voting makes me nervous as hell for some reason. I was really in the voting zone. I was, shall we say, acting like I was taking one of those old school Iowa tests, like I was being timed by a nun.

All of a sudden I hear this: “CA!!!!!! How you doin? What’s goin on? You seen the blog yet today? Well, you better look tomorrow. Hardy har har har hahahahah. I’m gonna vote in front of you. How was your date last night? Hardy har har.” I actually didn’t get many words in at all.

Then I started laughing so hard I almost threw up or peed my pants or both, and I had to throw my ballot out and start a new one cause I screwed up. still am chuckling over the whole thing. I didn’t realize Larry taped it, but I guess that’s okay. Then we smoked and bitched about the world. Well, I bitched about the world. Larry just listened and smoked. Then I smoked while I still can in this city, and thought about how I’m glad I have connections in Kentucky. Then I thought about how there might be a whole new slew of articles by me coming soon in Cbeat Music about bands in Kentucky.

C.A. MacConnell says:

One more thing. Usually I promote world peace and to each his/her own and shit, but Jean, there’s a sense of humor store by the sandwich shop on Jefferson.

Jackie says:


I’ve know Larry for a few years now. I don’t think he knows how truly funny he can me. Your response to this post is just as funny.

hard as nails says:

jean and numb should marry.

Deb says:

Pretty mad as hell about this issue 5 thing. I’m tired of always feeling screwed here. Covington or anywhere in Kentucky is looking better and better.

Marilyn says:

LMAO – the whole exchange sounds like Chip & Dale; “You go first. No, no, no, you go first. After you.”

I’m grinning from ear to ear (something I’ve not done enough of lately)… not only did the democrats pretty well mop up, but I just heard that Rumsfeld is OUTTA HERE!!! Whoo Hoo!

After all this victory, I’m less upset by the Issue 5 bullshit. (Yes, I’m a smoker.) However, this will hit home soon enough. The no smoking stuff is supposed to go into effect in 30 days. Now are we gonna have ciggie police?

And, have you ever noticed that when we smokers ARE outside smoking, the non-smokers go by fanning their noses and giving us disgusting looks? Do you reckon this will stop?

Roy says:

30 days? Really? I thought we would have at least until the first of next year. Shit.

Marilyn says:

Roy, what I heard on the local news at noon is that the ban could go into effect in as early as 30 days. So I could be mistaken, or mislead. Whatever.

Excuse me folks, but is there something wrong in a land wherein a person can apply for and receive a permit to carry a concealed weapon, but we cannot smoke?

Smoking guns, Yes. Smoking tobacco, No. Go figure…

Babble On says:

I don’t smoke but the whole ban seems soooooooooooooo Cincinnati to me. It’s like this city don’t know how to help itself. How bars are going to struggle to stay open. Shit, you are suppose to be able to smoke in bars. This city is retarded.

John says:

The whole fucking thing pisses me off. You bet I’m with the rest of you when it comes to going over the bridge to Kentucky. I hope Cincinnati becomes even more of a ghost town.

and you know what? CityBeat WANTED issue 5 to pass. What kind of bullshit is that. Goodbye citybeat, hello Cin weekly.

Will says:

Does CA smoke?

Becky says:

The post was funny enough and I like the way the election went but the smoking thing is getting to me as well. It’s just another reason to move out of this city. I have friends in Northern Kentucky and thats where its happening for me I think.

Maria says:

I understand how you all feel, but again, some of us nonsmokers like to go to bars too. If the bar is big enough, maybe they could have a smoking section and a non smoking section. That would please everybody I think.

Eddie says:


Didn’t you vote? Issue 5 BANS smoking all together. The choice between smoking and nonsmoking has been taken away.

Matt says:

It doesn’t surprise me that CityBeat would be all for issue 5. Again, this paper is pretty much mainstream, not really alternative.

I wonder how all the smokers who work there, and I know there are a bunch because you can see them out in front of the building smoking away, feel about their boss supporting the issue?

It’s a shame we can’t have a real alternative here. A lot of us are really ready for it.

numb says:

i voted for issue 8: kill this blog.

Polly says:

I mean no offense to Larry or CA because I know they write for CityBeat and I enjoy their work, but when you live in bigger cities, you come to know what to expect from an alternative newspaper.

I lived in Seattle for two years and the Stranger was always the alternative of choice. They were way out there, smart and entertaining and you never knew what to expect from them. While CityBeat isn’t all that bad, it is very down the middle of the road and you ALWAYS know what to expect. Very predictable stuff every week – right down to the special issues.

Again, no offense. The paper is probably doing what this small market can bear but the people who put it together really need to know that they’re not really putting out a true alternative.

Babble On says:

Old buddy will ….. CA says she smokes in her comment.

Marilyn says:

Keep it in perspective guys…

I’m as committed a smoker as any person here (believe me!). But we can’t lose sight of the bigger picture.

The elections yesterday were, overall, a real sweep for the middle class. People are finally getting on board and seeing that the policies that have been forced on us by a war-driven regime are not working and better yet, we don’t want to continue to “stay this frickin’ course”.

Despite the loss of our right to smoke, we have won the bigger victory.

Man of the Hour says:

“we have won the bigger victory.”

What? having to go outside to smoke a damn cigarette when drinking at a bar?

Maybe I’m kidding a little, but it upsets me.

Matt says:

Hey Numb,

Why don’t you go have sex with yourself?

The dialogue between C.A. and Larry was a metaphor for the process of voting, namely jive-talking between candidates and voters.
Jive-talking is good. Let’s just keep it in perspective. Right, Jean and numb?

No comment on Issue 5.

Roger says:

I wake up this morning to the news that the Dems have taken both the senate and the house. The answer my friend is blowing in the wind. Change.

Jean says:

For your information, I have a sense of humor, C.A. I laugh when I see or read something funny. This post is neither.

C.A. MacConnell says:

I love The Stranger. I lived in Seattle for a while…it’s a great paper. Agreed. Top notch alternative.

ArtPro says:

I am seeing this “so Cincinnati” line of reasoning on this thread, but Issue 5 was an Ohio-wide vote. This puts the Ohio and Cincinnati more in line with places like New York City that have already banned smoking. If you’ve ever wanted Cincinnati to be more like New York City, then here you are.

The numbers nationally show that smoking in bars doesn’t hurt business except in the very short term. Look at Sitwell’s. They went non-smoking and they’re doing great. And with Sitwells, you had direct competition from Highlands pretty close. If people won’t jump across MLK to smoke, will they jump the river in real numbers? Not enough to notice once you start picking more people that don’t smoke… and women that don’t want smoke in their clothes. 😉

Matt says:

You don’t smoke do you – ArtPro person? You don’t have the ability to put yourself in our shoes. The government controls enough of our lives, controls enough of where we can and can’t smoke. Some of us are sick of it.

I think you’re a so called do gooder – not liking you so much.

ArtPro says:

Matt, I think you’re reading some things into my post that aren’t there. I’m mainly reacting to the contention that this is somehow a Cincinnati or Downtown thing, and it is not. This is a national trend that Ohio is somewhere in the middle of the curve on adopting. Smoking is on the way out nationally. There is little that can be done about that. The other thing is it just isn’t true that this hurts businesses long-term based on the data that we have.

Your assumptions are little off. You’re right that I’m not a smoker. But I was a grad student, so I clearly do not mind second-hand smoke. 😉

I certainly hope that I do good. My religion teacher in high school would be so pleased. 😉

C.A. MacConnell says:

Jean, if you don’t think this post is funny, you probably won’t think “The Car Family” by CA MacConnell is funny either; however, Larry mentioned after we voted that “The Car Family” made him laugh out loud until he was doubled over with his stomach aching, and that he thought the article could be resubmitted for publication in a footlong list of numerous big bucks national magazines.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

et cetera
%d bloggers like this: