Smoke more cigarettes in Cincinnati bars and blow the smoke up the Health Department’s ass.
Eat cheese coneys until I gain an additional one hundred pounds.
Eat more often at Redfish.
Smoke more crack but enjoy it less.
Save money on toilet paper and start picking up Cin Weekly. It’s free. Seriously.
Continue to dodge child support. The kid doesn’t even look like me.
Continue to live off unemployment.
Remain an outstanding citizen of The Queen City.
Alan, The Drunk & Drug Addict.