Officials here in Cincinnati have denied reports that a Waffle House will be moving into the old Masionette location over on Sixth Street.
“That’s nuts,” one city official said off record. “We could never support anything like that here downtown. It would draw too much attention. We like a quiet downtown.”
Waffle House is known for its egg dishes, peppered hash browns, cheese melt plates and other gourmet food.
“It would be nice to get a little culture back to Sixth Street, but getting a Waffle House here is a little out of our league,” said another city official – or he told me he was a city official. “We’re trying to get another Skyline Chili to move into that spot.”
Waffle House is a famous restaurant chain well known for being open 24/7. Most don’t even have locks on their doors.
“A 24/7 restaurant in the heart of downtown? You gotta be shitting me,” said a want-to-be city official. “There’s no way that could happen. “We gotta get out of here before the sun goes down, before those Over-the-Rhine folk start heading this way.”
A local crack dealer thinks a Waffle House downtown would be good for his business.
“Those mother-fuckin’ kids get trashed and show up at the old Waffle House to eat their fuckin’ hangovers away – know that I’m sayin’?” the crack dealer explained. “We can sell them some quality crack after they get done eatin’ their waffles – know what I’m sayin’? It would be a good thang for this mother-fuckin’ town all round – know what I’m sayin’?
Yes, we know what he’s saying, but at present, it looks like the old Maisonette location will be remaining vacant.
“White Castle is interested,” said a person I met walking down the sidewalk.
Judy Darling,
LOL Blog Reporter
(Photo: Google.com)
This is damn funny! Actually, we could use a Waffle House downtown 🙂
Was this really going to happen?
I know this is a joke, but having a Waffle House downtown would be super!
Maybe we could have a “Crack”er Barrel.
Or how about a McDonald’s? We can’t even get that downtown?
If only you were being serious. I would be great to be a waffle house downtown.
I really got sick at a Waffle House about two years ago. I haven’t been back since.
Just another LOL Cincinnati putdown.
This is fucking funny!!!!!
You had me going for a minute there! I wouldn’t mind having one of these downtown. I still miss Frisch’s.
if we can’t keep a mcdonald’s downtown, i doubt if a waffle house would work. yes, put in another chili place.
Don’t get my hopes up. I thought you were being real!
Unless you like chili, the fast food available downtown really, really sucks.
You had me going!!
I suspect “Judy Darling” is really Larry Gross who just can’t resist putting down Cincinnati. He did it also in his column this week.
Yes, Cincinnati does have it’s problems, but you have already made your point. Do you have to keep hammering it into the ground?
Larry (or Judy) just tells it the way it is. That’s all.
As quoted to our erstwhile reporter, Judy Darling: … “We gotta get out of here before the sun goes down, before those Over-the-Rhine folk start heading this way.”
Lordy, lordy! 🙂
I guess that includes me!!
I liked this! I think this Judy Darling should continue on with more “fake” news reports.
Good reporting. Very “Onion-esque”. I like that.
I want some peppered hash browns! Truly a gourmet treat…
I thought this was totally hilarious! You need to keep doing this type of thing.
I actually love the Waffle House. Go to the one over in Covington all the time.
Always picking on the city here aren’t you? Always looking for something wrong.
I LOVE IT!
Now this was pretty darn funny.
I don’t see anything funny about talking to a crack dealer.
I dig the old waffle house. Good eats and a good price. Hell yes, let’s get one downtown.
I could never afford to go to the Maisonette but Waffle House would be another story. Bring it on.
I liked this A LOT. More Judy Darling!
dumb. boring.
The return of numb and his ass comments. How sad.
The Maisonette was heaven. The Waffle House makes me want to puke.
[…] and entertainment activity in downtown Cincinnati ever since the reported opportunity to get a Waffle House restaurant in the old Maisonette location fell through last week. That was just the latest in a list of failed remedies for The Queen […]