CityBeat’s Living Out Loud – Cincinnati Blog

{January 29, 2007}   I Want It Now

man-and-woman-cartoon.jpgI think I’m pretty good to my wife.

I always turn my paycheck over to her so she can keep track of the finances and pay the bills. I take out the trash. Sometimes I’ll go get her a beer when we’re watching television. I even mow the lawn in the spring and summer and will even rake some leaves in the fall. I’m a decent kind of guy. Do I want something in return? Yes.

What I want in return is sex. When I want it, I want it now. I think this is a man’s right.

If she has a headache, that’s just an excuse. Take off your clothes.

If she’s just not in the mood, well I am. Spread your legs.

If she’s made plans to go out with a girlfriend, call her up and say you’re going to be late. I need my release now.

If she’s on her period, oral sex will do. Get down there.

If she says no to any of this, pull up your dress, woman. You’re going to get a good spanking.

I also don’t think a man thinks like a woman who wants a little romance before getting down to it. Getting down to it – the sex – is what it’s all about. Real men don’t beat around the bush.




Polly says:

Wow. Do I ever feel sorry for the “little woman.”

Karen says:

Real men don’t beat around the bush.

No, real men treat their wives with respect.

Gail says:

I realize this is a joke and its kind of funny – but the thing is, there are guys out there exactly like this.

Deb says:

I think your name is really Troy and your penis is the size of a toothpick. Also, you are an asshole.

Rita says:

Of course this is just a composite of a “male” who doesn’t want a wife but a prostitute. Are you sure his real name isn’t Dick.

I know this is suppose to be funny, but emotional/sexual abuse doesn’t seem to make me laugh. Gail is right – there are “males” out there like this. That is one of the reasons we must have shelters for women to get away from the Pauls of the world.

I still find it interesting that society – including this site – feels it is still acceptible to promote this type of image about women and seeing them as a “piece of meat”.

Thanks. I think I will go vomit now.

Susan says:

Great post yesterday. Now back to the trash.

del says:

this site is getting really good at satire.

Janet says:

Your wife’s a fool to put up with a idiot like you.

Paul's Wife says:

I’m doing it with the mail man right now.

Erin says:

I’m guessing this Paul asshole was born in the 1950’s. Men today really don’t think like this. If my husband expected sex on demand, he would be a dead man by now.

Biscuit says:


Bev says:

Hey – Paul the pig!

Thanks for the post!

Marty says:

I know this was meant as a joke and its funny in its own way but in another way its insulting to women. Really, spanking is wife beating.

hard as nails says:

paul’s wife should be counting her blessings. at least she’s not married to mike hunt.

Do you guys have any idea what I put in his food when he’s not looking?

Cause Paul is clueless.


hard as nails says:

Cause Paul is clueless

Cause Paul is really Dick

Man of the Hour says:

Did you ever stop to think that maybe Paul’s wife likes to be spanked? You chicks are so uptight here today.

Maggie says:

Perhaps I’m a sick person, but I found the humor here. Come on, guys like this don’t really exist.

Marilyn says:

Maggie: Yes indeedy men like this really DO exist. I could introduce you to a plethora of male cousins that are EXACTLY like this!

Man of the Hour: Yep, spanking, when it is a mutual playtime could be just peachy. Only when the consent is not mutual, the problems begin.

Paul: Just curious as to what you do for your woman. You want oral sex, even if she is menstruating. Do you perform oral for her during this time?

Riuth says:

Paul. Pig.

Mike Hunt says:

Almost every woman I’ve ever spanked liked it — and every one of them needed it.

Janice says:

Mike Hunt is also a fucking pig.

Charlene says:

I just can’t find the humor in this one at all. Yes, spanking is wife beating. Just when you think everybody knows that horrible…………

Phil says:

So Mike Hunt,
After you fucked your sheep, did you then spank her?

Paul's Wife says:

My cheeks. They are so red.

Babble On says:

You want oral sex, even if she is menstruating. Do you perform oral for her during this time?


Linda says:

Do you know how many women in this country have to put up with being beaten? Many are killed. None get over the emotional scars from this. This destroys lives.

This post, this story is horrible enough. To make it worse you put a tasteless cartoon to go with it.

I won’t be coming back here.

Beth says:

“also don’t think a man thinks like a woman who wants a little romance before getting down to it.”

What’s a little romance to you, Jackass? Putting your fingers up her ass and then licking them?

You’re a vile man.

Rita says:

Explain to my why it is acceptable to have a post portraying sexism and physical/emotional abuse as humorous satire. What’s next? Maybe we can have a laugh about sex offenders and children. Why is it acceptable to portray women in such a negative prejudicial fashion?

Yes there are men like this – who treats women like they are not real life forms, let alone equal. If you are not aware of this — well, let me think, maybe you are a full blown or latent Paul aka Dick.

hard as nails says:

i sense a paul fan club is not going to happen here.

Marilyn says:

Paul wrote: …”Real men don’t beat around the bush.”

Marilyn says: Yeah, he takes care of that part!!

Jenny says:

The guy doing the spanking looks like Joey on “Friends.” Is he spanking Rachel?

ED says:

Paul wrote: …”Real men don’t beat around the bush.”

Marilyn says: Yeah, he takes care of that part!!

At least he’s not spanking that – not yet!

Jim Stanton says:

Does anyone remember the old country music song “Put Another Log on the Fire?” Go to google and fine it, then I think you’ll understand this Paul character.

Mind you, I don’t think what he’s doing is right.

Gail says:

Yes, yes. When in doubt, put up an amusing story about wife beating. That’s always good for a laugh.

Chin says:

Whenever I come here, I’m always reminded what a small town Cincinnati is. Don’t you people read other blogs? Why is there all this outrage over this simple, funny little post?

Go the blogroll on the right and check out Gawker or the Stranger Blog or Wonkette. They make fun of EVERYTHING and people laugh at it. BECAUSE IT’S FUNNY.

Uptight Cincinnati people, you need to be smoking pot.

I think this blog is great.

Jill says:

I laughed. Sue me.

hard as nails says:

The guy doing the spanking looks like Joey on “Friends.” Is he spanking Rachel?

i think the guy looks like agent cooper from “twin peaks.” maybe he’s spanking the log lady.

Matt says:

Right on Chin! You said it perfectly. People here need to get a sense of humor.

Susan says:

I think it’s time for a new person at the head of this site. It has been going downhill lately – just shock and provoke. Marilyn writes the best posts here, put her in charge. I think this Gross guy is losing it all together.

Geri says:

Totally, completely tasteless post. I come here less and less.

Alex says:

I think the person being spanked is Jean or maybe that’s just wishful thinking.

Why do so many conservatives come here? I can’t figure that out. This was funny. Chin’s right – smoke a little weed. Get over it!

C.A. MacConnell says:

I just feel bad for the sheep.

jim says:

great post

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